Feeling That Way
by XxSeductionxX
Summary: Hiei is haunted by the day when he handed Kurama his mother's tear, so he leaves the Demon world in search of him. Mukuro is not his true mate. Hiei sets on a path of self discovery. Is it possible that it's Kurama? That can't be right... Can it?
1. Prologue

_Feeling That Way_

_Prologue_

_"I just don't feel that way about you..."_

_The words echoed inside his head. Over and over again. It was supposed to be a joke._

_"You fool! It's not for you!"_

_He had been embarrassed. Too embarrassed. A small blush had stained his cheeks. He hoped with everything he was, that Kurama would not notice it, and to his relief, he did not seem to. He watched as his mothers tear dangled from the red head's fingers. Long and delicate, they were fingers that could make a man squirm if used properly. Not that he would know anything about that. Not that he wanted to know or anything._

_Was he joking in the fact that it would be ridiculous if he ever had feelings for him? Or vise versa? Or was he trying to cover up the fact that Kurama did indeed have such feelings, but feared them. Or was it that he thought that Hiei had feelings for him and had wanted nothing to do with it? Kurama's laughing face echoed through out his mind,chasing him down a long corridor with no end. The sweet soft voice taunting him over and over again. "I just don't feel that way about you......Hiei."_

Hiei sat bolt upright, startled. His face was pink, a small little frown marred his handsome features. Sitting in a large cushioned chair on the right side of the bed, was Mukuro. She stared at him with a strange, almost longing expression. "You had a nightmare..." Hiei whipped his head around to glare at her with narrowed eyes."Don't be ridiculous." A green gaze still swam around in his head. Staring, mocking. "Don't lie to me Hiei. You've been having the same dream over and over again for a month now." Hiei scowled at her, his rage building. It was none of her concern what he dreamed!

"You are a fool, you cannot know my dreams Mukuro. You presume too much." With a much quieter voice he added. "Stop trying to get inside my head..." A soft chuckle drifted a crossed the room. She acted like she did not hear the last bit."Do I? So I suppose the dream has nothing to do with Kurama at all." A slight triumphant smile slide a crossed her features."Shut it." He responded, his eyes ripped away from her form. He did not want her to see the confusion or hesitation that laid there. He must have been talking in his sleep.

"I'm not a fool Hiei..." He spoke again, her voice now a softer, almost hurt tone, as if it were his fault he dreamed what he did! "I knew I could not keep you for long. I saw it in your face every night, in your eyes. I knew the day loomed closer and closer to the time when you would leave me. You are restless... I thought perhaps your journey would end with me. I was wrong, you have a little more to do it seems, before you can rest peacefully." Hiei turned to stare at her in astonishment, his eyes wide. He saw the look she gave him. A bitter sweet smile rested on her lips. Her eyes quivering with held back emotion. "I am not your mate...am I Hiei? Likewise, I have found...that you are not mine." Even still a smell of roses lingered in his subconscious, the smell of him. Hiei closed his eyes and tilted his head back letting it devour him. "No." He responded. A simple answer that held so much. Many words went unspoken between them. Silent goodbyes, that lasted only seconds. Mukuro got up out of her chair. Hiei dare not look at her. "I hope you find what you are looking for." She whispered. Her footsteps echoed through out the room as she left. A promise, a sad regret, a lasting farewell.


	2. Chapter 1: Through Your Window

Chapter One Through your window

Red eyes stared intensely through the second story window. Kurama just got home. Any minute the darkend room he gazed into, would burst with light. Any minute Kurama would come in, a look, a smile, a soft whispered word. Anything would delight him. Not that he would admit it. He had trouble admitting it even to himself. It still confused him to no end that Hiei felt the desire...no...The NEED to stalk Kurama.

That was exactly what he had been doing. Stalking him as a tiger stalks his prey. Watching him, every movement, every gesture held some special meaning. Hiei rested in the tree that loomed close to his house, and yet, not close enough. One branch reached out towards Kurama's window as the other part of the tree leaned away towards the sun, as if to hold on for dear life while it stretched to try to attain it's life source. Hiei felt much like that tree. Wanting to leave as his mind dictated he should, yet still holding on with every thing he had, afraid he would fall, knowing he would fall.

He hid along the trunk of the tree beneath the heavy leaves and branches waiting with patience of a hunter until Kurama's bedroom light suddenly illuminated the outer most limb. He was home! Hiei began to inch along it slowly, getting as close as he dared.

Inside, Kurama sighed. He had a long day of pleasing teachers, girls giggling when they passed, and jealous males giving him dirty looks. Dropping his a stack books on the mohogony desk in the corner of the room he began to undress. Hiei's eyes grew wide as he watched his milky white skin slowly reveal itself. He began to inch closer and closer as Kurama turned his back towards the window tossing his school shirt upon the floor.

Hiei sat crouching at the very tip of the branch, leaning as much as he could. His brain went blank, he couldn't think as he stared at Kurama's well toned back. Almost hypnotized. Even still his mind screamed at him. 'What are you doing?! He is your alli, nothing more!' Suddenly, and without warning a loud crack sounded out around the yard.

Hiei's eyes went wide as he felt the branch brake and begin to fall to the ground. He acted quickly and did the only thing he could. The tree was too far away for him to just jump back to it, and being distracted as he was, he did not even consider the ground. The fire demon leaped forward towards the top of the window sill, his fingers grasping it as tightly as he could, his legs spread on either side to avoid them dangling in front of the window.

Hiei gritted his teeth. He felt lost. How could he have been so foolish? Why was he here in the first place? He tried to leave. He tried so many times to no avail. Every time he would find himself back here, staring into his window like some kind of pathetic love sick girl. He disgusted himself, he could not accept the fact that for some reason, it was Kurama who made his demon heart pound. Who quickened his blood with fire, who taunted him in his sleep. He never wanted anything so badly. It didn't make sense!

He squeezed his eyes shut as Kurama opened the window with a frown, looking outside. His long red hair cascading over his shoulders like the finest silk. He spotted the branch below and the frown increased. Sure the tree was old but the branches have always been strong. It would not have fallen by itself. Kurama hopped onto the window sill, and then jumped down to the ground landing cat like on his feet. His keen eyes scanned the yard, but he sensed nothing.

A soft "tip!" sounded behind him. As if nimble feet jumped on his window sill and into his waiting room. Kurama's eyes widened. "Mother!" This was the last thing he needed. An Apparition to come in, wanting blood. He did not want his mother exposed to that. He spun around and jumped up to the window sill, taking a rose from his hair he entered his room.

The air seemed thick with silence, as he scanned his desk, his dresser, his bed, Hiei on the bed smirking at him, the floor, the closet. Kurama suddenly stiffened and turned back to Hiei smirking on the bed. He sighed in relief. A hand going to his forehead, lifting his bangs away. A soft smile came to his face and peace fell down upon him again. He put the flower away before addressing his visitor. "Hiei, you startled me." His voice seemed soft, almost a purr, or was that Hiei's imagination? "You're getting soft Kurama, I could of killed you." Kurama chuckled, his eyes closed before opening them again to stare deeply into Hiei's own. "Really? You are welcome to try." It was as if their words were like a dance back and forth between the two. Challenge, respond, challenge, respond. Tension lit the air between them.

"I did not come here to kill you."  
"A shame." "Is it really? I could if you wanted me to."  
"I think I will manage, besides now that your here, I would not want to disappoint my guest."  
"Hn."

Silence entered the room once more, before Kurama spoke. "Why ARE you here Hiei? Is their trouble in demon world?" Hiei averted his eyes at this question.  
"No, of course not."  
"Spirt world then?"  
"No." His irritation grew at this. Is that the only reason he visits? No he was certain he had visited just because, before...Hadn't he?

"Trouble with Mukuro?" A sly grin crossed his face, a twinkling came to his deep green eyes. Hiei whipped his head around and glared at Kurama. He was always so perceptive. Another long silence passed between them as they stared. "She...Is not my Mate." His choked out words said more then he could ever really say. His eyes held some sort of meaning. 'She is not my Mate Kurama, but I think I know who is...I think it might be...you.'

Kurama's soft voice filled the room breaking the tension that ensued after that statement. "I know." He whispered. "I've always known." 


End file.
